Spring Raven Photo, Poem and Delusion Rant

(today’s blog below)

 

The Birds are Calling My Name

 

 

As I walk I am filled with pain

The birds are calling my name

All around me people stare

How can they look and all be aware?

 

I know I was sick like this before

and it opened wide the door

For delusional dreaming and pain

But the problem still remains

 

The birds are calling my name

I am scared and filled with shame

How did I deserve this hell

I wish I could crawl into a shell

 

The birds they call my name

And there is no one really to blame

My life will end in pain

As all creation calls out my name

 

Leif Gregersen

April 30, 2018

 

Well, it has been something of an unhappy weekend. I wrote down all the things that are giving me stress right now and tried to deal with them. But in reality, problems with money, problems with relationships, not feeling motivated and experiencing depression seem to all come down to simply being lonely. One of my best friends is far away in Greenland and I don’t get a lot of visitors that can cheer me up, so I think that is a critical part of it. For the record, I do take anti-depressants but they don’t seem to be keeping me going 100%. Plus I have been isolated for a few days. When I get back from a May trip, I am going to try a new injectable medication that is supposed to work better on my psychosis, and also increase my moods a bit. I am a bit torn right now because I am wondering if medication or situation is more important when speaking of depression. I suppose they come in combination with each other. I was doing some research and read that Cognitive Behavioural Therapy alone has been proven to work better than medication alone. I do believe that it is important to try and get both, to face up to your psychological difficulties and also to use medication to maintain a proper balance of the chemicals in your body that can keep you depressed. Well, this is going to be a short blog entry today. I hope you enjoyed the content dear readers. I think I am going to do some creative searching and see if I can line up a counselling session. I went to drop-in counselling before and it was really helpful. I hope some of you out there who are suffering can do the same.

LG

 

4 comments

  1. Such a nice poem Lief, why not use some tags to reach out to more people? I get that about loneliness. I get it about life seeming simply meaningless at times. This might sound to clichéd but its at those down moments that the real growth happens. That you were able to convert that into these words is enough testament that there’s a mine there should you be willing to harness its power. Take care and take it easy. 😉

    Like

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